I’m an alt rock singer-songwriter that writes my songs for one person at a time. For hours I will wrestle with words and melodies so that I can give a single person hope and courage. When I sing my songs I want them to be an anthem rising up in a person’s heart.
But I’ve spent most of the last 2 years locked away on a recording project. I’m holding down a full time day job so there’s not a lot of time left to focus on my music and the complexities of writing, recording, designing and manufacturing a CD is enormous … but it’s why I write and play music – to change one heart at a time.
The hardest part of the recording has been the limits has caused meaning I’ve played live only a few times. I write my songs for a live audience and there has only been a handful of opportunities I’ve had to play for one.
The second problem is that people judge the success of a musician on the size of the audience they play for – the bigger the concert venue and the longer the line snaking around the building the better musician I must be …
But I’m not 20 something anymore so I’m over the self-important “green room” elitism most musicians seem to live for. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve performed on stage for thousands of people many times over and I’ve loved it when thousands of voices join together in chorus – but it also comes with schedule demands and the need for Concert Security that squirrel the musicians away from the audience and isolates me from the very people I’m making the music for. It’s always seemed pretentious to me to be backstage so I always head out front to meet and hang with the most important people there – not the performers … the audience. I want to hear first-hand people’s stories and look them in the eye and get to know them one-on-one so I can see what my songs have done for them.
I was in the process of mixing the CD when on a cold winters night in Auckland I drove up to a suburban house for a Mercy Ships “get together” for people who had served on the ship. 20 or so people were crushing into a lounge to hear a long-standing Mercy Ships staff member who was over from the US. I’d been invited to sing the song I’ve written for Mercy Ships – Hope On My Horizon but I haven’t served on the ship in a volunteer capacity so I felt like a fish out of water … and to make it all worse I was going to start the evening with my song.
We were sardines in a sitting room sitting atop of each other … there was no smoke machine, no lighting rig, no power amps or fold back or In Ear Monitor system or Front of House PA … not even a multimedia countdown introduction or a warm-up act! There was just me and my guitar eyeball to eyeball with a bunch of strangers who weren’t there to listen to me … so as I strummed the first chord and began my song I knew I had about 3min and 30secs to connect with them, tell them a story and hopefully inspire them with my words and music and set the evening up for them.
That night I was impressed with the close connection that comes from playing for a small intimate group of people. It’s one thing to record music and load it up on the web so people can listen and give you some “Likes” and comments but it’s not the same as looking an audience in the eye while you sing, seeing them tap their feet when they like what they hear or worse still, look down at their phones if your music doesn’t stir their hearts and souls. It’s a raw uncomplicated “lie detector” that tells you if your songs are worthy of the audience.
That night was great and they loved “Hope On My Horizon” and I realised I couldn’t wait to get back to playing live again and being with the people I wrote these songs for.
It’s been exciting to get playing again and to do that on the North West of the US! The privilege and exhilaration of playing in places I’ve never played before to bunches of total strangers is a test of me as a person and whether my music connects with people and makes a difference in THEIR world.
You may not realise it but it’s also terrifying for an introverted musician like me! When I pulled up at my first gig with only the host contact, without knowing anyone else or anything about the audience who started arriving I was out of my comfort zone and about to put myself and the songs off the soon-to-be-released CD to the test.
What if they didn’t like my music? How would it be for the hosts if the audience got bored, stood up and left during my set? How would I cope if they were more interested in their smart phones than the smart-alec songwriter :p
This was both a test of the CD songs and me as a performer – the moment of reckoning for me to start playing again … I sucked it up and leaned forward into faith …
When I wrapped up my set of songs I was met by calls for an encore and our host Lee jumped up to the mic. He talked about how he didn’t really know me before I drove up and wasn’t quite sure what his wife had gotten them into. He described how my songs and stories of my own struggles and following my my faith had meant something to him and that he wanted people to support and get behind me and my music. The night was over but people stayed around talking and kindly thrusting wads of bills into the wooden donation box until one by one we bid each other goodnight and slowly strolled off into the cool Salem summer night.
It was in the moments talking that night that my soul and spirit were touched. The people I wrote these songs for – Liz, Don, Lee, Christian, and so many others – gave me what I need to keep writing, to keep singing, to keep serving the audience. They make me a person who looks beyond my own world, beyond the typical “self-orbiting rock star system” and makes me break out of my introverted shell to give myself away for the audience and pour out my energy and hope for them – it’s these moments touring that makes me a better person.
I had my leg in the air lying on the couch the day after my knee surgery. I admit it I was there because of my own stupidity … after singing in EMCs The Voice in Boston I slipped on ice. Piling into my inbox were \”get well soon\” messages so in between painkillers I was reflecting on what I could do for them to show my gratitude for their the support and encouragement.
Staring back at me was an email invitation for a national TV shoot singing songs off my CD. Too excited to read it properly (… c\’mon I\’ve just had surgery and at the best of times \”details focused\” is not how you\’d describe this rock musicianary singer songwriter) I didn\’t think twice hitting reply and was frantically forming vaguely intelligible sentences when I spotted the date … the shoot was 4 days away!
My gung-ho grin was over run by panic-filled pandamonium. DEFCON1 started blaring followed by the surgeon\’s icy face floating in front of me \”blah blah blah elevation for 2 days blah blah blah no exercise for 4 weeks blah blah blah …\” DEFCON2 crushed my eyes closed with mad fears of letting my fans down after they’d been there for me. DEFCON3 slammed my pain-addled peace … would I miss this chance and never be considered again if I turned Shine TV down? DEFCON4’s straight-jacket insanity swelled around me … how in all the world could I be ready in 4 days! I didn\’t have any tracks from the recording sessions ready. …
A deer frozen in headlights I was stunned as this opportunity growled towards me like a F60 pickup truck when an email \”bling\” snapped the silence – it was a fan telling me how much my music meant to them. The shrill sirens faded and the quiet calm confidence that comes from knowing True North rolled over me … there\’s nothing quite like doing what you know God made you to do to hold back the insanity screaming at you \”WHAT ARE YOU THINKING!\” .
I clicked over to the comment made by the fan on my blog and found even more supporters spurring me on. I realised I would never feel ready – there would always be obstacles to making music that gives people strength and courage so I did what any crazy musician would do and asked the station for a 2 week delay while immediately contacting the record Mixing Engineer asking for a mix without my lead vocal track …
Reason suddenly joined in the jaberring conversation logically reminding me I could be a flop at the shoot and disappoint Shine TV and my fans. I could injure myself performing so close to my surgery when my surgeon had expressly told me no exercise for 4 weeks.
When I think about it now I realise I was an idiot. What was I thinking! If I was going to do a TV shoot I should make sure I had a band to appear with me, be fully rehearsed, be fit and strong, fully pumped to give my best shot for the station and for all my supporters …
Instead I was committing to a national TV appearance straight after knee surgery without a band or even any instruments, singing karaoke through painkillers while trying to look like a polished performer straddling a stool in case I fell over … I knew I wouldn\’t be able to give my best performance and may in fact lose the plot with my fuzzy brain while blowing out my knee jumping around rocking out within a week of surgery when my surgeon had given me express instructions to rest and not exercise for a month! Enthusiasm and pursuing your calling are an unstable partner to a busted up body …
The TV station emailed me straight back telling me the crew was only available for a limited window and they could delay only 3 days. It would mean a TV shoot 7 days after knee surgery but I was willing to run the risk … God created a whole bunch in that time so with whispered prayers and a smidge of crazy courage I confirmed the date.
5 days later I was in the studio with the amazing Shine TV crew and it went …. GREAT!
Sure I had to sit on a stool for some of the shoot (I keep telling myself it was to achieve that casual-singer-songwriter-cafe-performer look when it was just covering for the fact I needed to sit down) while I dialed down my enthusiasm. And as you\’d expect I did hurt my knee by rocking out a little too much but not enough to stop me from seizing the opportunity for my fans and for Shine too – the crew loved it and the station got what they wanted.
I drove away satisfied that I’d supported Shine TV and given my best for my fans … with a little help from some painkillers too :p
After all this is bigger than just me – what\’s the point of making my music if I\’m not doing it for others, for you, to bring you hope and healing. Most things in my life have not panned out how I expected they would. Life seems to offer challenges and opportunities in unexpected ways and takes me off my beaten track. After lots of unexpected adventures I\’ve learned to recognise this as it seems to be the way with me. I can confidently say that life, and singing on TV, never works out the way you planned!
Share and comment below …
Pete
Listen to what others are saying about Peter Woolston!
\”5 out of 5 Stars\”
Heath Andrews, Music Critic
\”kicking rock … grand confident vocals … layered guitars
… similar timbre to Switchfoot\” Kelly O’Neil (Foreigner, Kevin Max, Jaci Velasquez, CCM & CrossWalk magazines)
“… drawing comparisons to artists like Jon Foreman, Bono and Martin Smith\” Scoop Independent News
And now you can download Peter\’s latest single for free!
I have a confession – I don’t really like musical reality TV shows like American Idol and Britain’s Got Talent. It’s not always been like that – I’ve competed in singing and songwriting contests and even won. But I’ve always wanted more than the “instant fame in a bottle” kinda thing and realised that God’s way of getting there was through commitment and hard work rather than on the coattails of a contest. I wanted to write and sing songs that lasted longer than 2 minutes or didn’t end with a jury of judges dissecting my pre-canned performance. I wanted a real relationship with fans, fans like you, that lasted longer than a TV season.
But I’m not signed to a global record conglomerate so it’s hard to find ways to reach out beyond little ol’ New Zealand to people in other places in the world. Sometimes it gets me down trying to be heard above the market noise as it’s just me working on my music (no PR pro, no advertising architect, no social media strategist etc). But I keep reaching out because there’s those special times when one of my songs connects with someone – someone like you – and helps you keep going with your God-given passion to make a difference in your world. In between those times it can get a little discouraging in the global music school yard while the school bully sneers at you and calls out “give up … no one’s listening to you”.
December last year was one of those times. I had finished recording the CD in Australia and was back at my day job suffering from the daily-grind when my co-worker Chris forwarded an email telling me I should enter EMC’s “The Voice” contest. I have to confess I didn’t even really look at his email – I don’t like those contests and getting my music out there was becoming just too hard. But then my boss Arron bugged me about entering and then another workmate Phil chimed in … so I figured maybe I should listen to them instead of my doubts. Sometimes when the School Bully is taunting you it’s smarter to listen to the people who believe in you instead.
“The Voice” was a global EMC contest searching for someone with a song to inspire 15,000 people worldwide. I realised I shouldn’t listen to the discouraging naysayer in my head and instead entered my song “I Believe In You”, off my upcoming CD, for these people all over the world – people I believe in.
It’s amazing how you feel when you align yourself with truth instead of fears – I too often forget that “fear is a liar”. It was both exhilarating and terrifying putting together a video audition in my garage but I realised this was bigger than me – this wasn’t about whether I was liked, or popular, or even a success – this was an opportunity to put an anthem of hope in people’s hearts all over the world – and that’s why I make music.
Sure I had my pride to lose. I had my confidence to lose. And I knew that I was even going to annoy some people – not everyone likes alternative rock, and not everyone likes my rasping voice singing my alternative rock songs. Instead of getting rejected by a few people here was my chance to get rejected by tens of thousands all over the world ….
But because of a few encouraging friends I ended up as a finalist – my wife and I were flown (all expenses paid) from New Zealand to Boston so I could perform in the finals. I sang in the finals and my song was streamed to over 15,000 people worldwide across weeks in January plus countless people have downloaded my song “I Believe In You”. I wish I could say I won first place but that didn’t happen. What I did win was a whole bunch of new friends and fans from all over the world and the inspiration of the workmates who backed me in the first place.
Sometimes winning against the School Bully doesn’t mean coming out the victor … sometimes it just comes down to standing your ground and not giving up – as Ephesians 6:13 puts it “You’re up against far more than you can handle on your own. Take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it’s all over but the shouting you’ll still be on your feet.”
Instead of listening to those lies in your head watch my “Behind the Scenes at The Voice” video above where I’m singing my song “I Believe In You” in Boston and then tell me what you think below cos “… you’ve got what it takes – I believe in you!” Share and comment below … Pete
The new fund-raising record for Mercy Ships is almost out and I’ve started planning a tour but the Mercy Ships Reunion has struck me – the intimacy and connection singing in someone’s lounge has collided with the amazing support from people like you to inspire me to ditch the stage for your sitting room! We can get up close and personal with the new songs while we celebrate the journey of releasing the record together. Just imagine having your best friends and me gathered in one room for a live performance of the record – so close you can reach out and touch the songs and their stories. This beats a ‘normal’ live concert with a powerful feeling of connection, presence and intimacy – the songs and the sound in a candle lit lounge room or a sun-drenched summer porch give the music a chance to breathe, and emotions are free to roam wild. It’s a unique, irreplaceable, once-off, beautifully memorable experience.
It’s actually the easiest thing in the world to host me … well, maybe second easiest, right after breathing. You send me an invitation, we agree on a date when I can make it to where you are (I’ve already got flights to the USA booked plus NZ locations too), you invite some friends around and set up a comfy space in which to enjoy the music. It really is that simple 🙂
Music is one of the key elements of what makes us human. Once upon a time we gathered around the fire to tell stories and sing songs and a house concert is simply friends and family gathering again to listen to stories told by troubadours whose lives are dedicated to putting to music the deeper journeys we all share as humans. By having me play at your place you are a direct patron of the arts within your community, and you support the creation of authentic, worthwhile art by giving artists like me a sustainable platform from which to share our heart’s songs. The value of this goes far beyond what I have the words to communicate here.